Never did I ever think I would revert to hiding in the bathroom to take a break from my family. The nest is empty no more, and while I’m loving my young adult children being home, it does get crazy sometimes.
Moms of little ones are going through this now, but never did I ever think I would be yelling the other night, “Stop saying my name,” like I did when they were little children. And they don’t just say “mom” once; it’s over and over and over.
In no way am I making light of the crisis our world is in right now; however, I do have to find things that make me laugh. It’s sometimes my coping mechanism, and to be honest, those who know me will agree — I love to clown around.
Apparently, our four children inherited their mother’s silliness. My poor husband gets dragged into the adventures.
Never did I ever think we would be playing sardines with our young adult children. It’s a fun family game that is basically hide and seek. One person hides, and when you find the person, you hide with them till the last person figures it out, and then they are it.
All was fun and games until one of my little 6-foot-2 boys decided to hide in the dryer. Apparently, you must set clear boundaries, even for adult men. I will leave it up to you readers to imagine the tone used as the inner bear in me cried, “What were you thinking?”
I had to laugh as one of my neighbors was walking by with her young son one day. As usual, the raucous Ralls were out in full force playing games in the driveway. He looked at his mom and said, “Why are they allowed to have a party?”
Rall party of six has made our driveway look like a used car lot again. The mom told her son, “That’s just their children home.”
Never did I ever think my Alexa would begin speaking as if it were Pikachu. Both sons thought this was hysterical, as they loved Pokemon growing up.
Never did I ever think I would be on a Zoom call about to speak and have to stay muted as I heard burping and looked up to see our college-football-player son flexing in the hallway mirror across from my office.
“Honey, please put on some clothes and put the guns away.”
Again, you can imagine my tone and my inflection.
My favorite “never did I ever” moment relates to our garage that is now transformed into a gym — but a gym like no other, as we have disco balls hung overhead to brighten up our workouts.
Never did I ever think my 21-year-old son would clean out the refrigerator, reorganize the pantry and clean everything in sight. I keep coming up with new things for him to clean, and I have girlfriends wanting to rent him out for the summer.
Never did I ever think spa day with my oldest daughter would include her helping touch up the roots (thank you, Kimberly and Brad Paisley, for the idea), or a dance-off to Sir Twitch-A-Lot to embrace girl time.
This is only a small sample of “never did I ever.” We will never get these moments back, and until a few months ago, I was missing playing the role that I love most, next to wife: mom.
I hope you are finding some laughter in these troubling days, and I also hope you take away some good. To all those on the frontlines working for us, thank you. Because of you, my family is together and safe.